| (no subject) |
[Aug. 27th, 2008|02:24 am] |
I am very happy right now. I have met a very cute girl and it appears her adorableness has eroded my usual poetic skills.
I am only pausing to briefly note how small of a world it is, as I have fallen for a girl from agroup of people who I thougt I'd ha e much rather forgotten. Also I do not think I will be able to move to Ann Arbor as planned, how to break the news to Ben, Jacob and Rob?
One last thing, The Watchmen is amazing. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 30th, 2008|10:54 pm] |
I have abandonment issues, and she used those to hurt me. To fucking rip me to shreds.
I feel so broken. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 25th, 2008|10:59 pm] |
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So, I don't understand sex. Before having sex I didn't understand, during sex I still didn't understand stand it, and especially after sex I didn't understand it. Now it might be that I'm bad at sex and it might be that I'm missing something, but I just don't get it. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jul. 30th, 2007|11:13 am] |
| [ | The Minstrels Play |
| | Rise Against - Prayer of the Refugee | ] |
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Chadwich took the free ColorQuiz.com personality test! "Wants to prove to himself and others that nothing ..."
Click here to read the rest of the results.
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| (no subject) |
[Oct. 21st, 2006|04:28 pm] |
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I am now officially a cashier at Sam's club in Green Bay. |
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| Um... |
[Oct. 17th, 2006|03:13 am] |
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I had a very bipolar day. I was very depressed at Greg's funeral/viewing, but I am very, very happy now... |
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| (no subject) |
[Oct. 5th, 2006|11:22 am] |
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I wonder why I can never get along with my english teachers? Mayhaps it is because none of them have ever knew what they were doing. |
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| (no subject) |
[Sep. 13th, 2006|01:56 am] |
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The only thing that really makes me happy is helping others. Everything else just numbs the self hatred I feel. |
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| (no subject) |
[Sep. 6th, 2006|11:16 pm] |
No, slicing myself open does not always make me feel better. I do always deserve it though. |
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| (no subject) |
[Sep. 5th, 2006|01:38 am] |
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It seems that lately I really wish to write very emo entry before I go to bed, and when I wake up I no longer feel as bad about humanity, although as the day goes on, my hatred for humanity returns. |
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| (no subject) |
[Sep. 3rd, 2006|02:29 pm] |
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This attempt at being antisocial is failing. |
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| Advertisement: |
[Sep. 1st, 2006|10:35 pm] |
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Wanted: A cute girl, who is sad all the time, to be mine for an ephemeral period of time before breaking my heart. |
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| (no subject) |
[Aug. 29th, 2006|08:23 pm] |
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I've decicded to more of less give up on life, as nothing anyone does really matters and no matter how extreme your actions you really can't help very many people. |
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| (no subject) |
[Aug. 28th, 2006|01:13 am] |
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It increases my mood to know that I have some time off from school, so that I can crawl into a pit and be antisocial for a while. I am fed up with mostly everyone. |
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| (no subject) |
[Aug. 27th, 2006|01:45 am] |
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It is partially because I am a masochist, but mostly because it is an act of contrition and because I truly am a terrible person. |
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| Christ, I'm falling again |
[Aug. 24th, 2006|12:22 am] |
| [ | My Mood |
| |  Artic | ] |
| [ | The Minstrels Play |
| | Eminem - Say my Name | ] |
But I will not complain, I could have it much worse. I must learn not to fail. |
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| (no subject) |
[Aug. 19th, 2006|07:55 pm] |
| [ | My Mood |
| |  blah | ] |
I alhttp://www.flickr.com/photos/18533812@N00/sets/72157594244862943/
The pictures from our trip to Bristol '06, if I get the ones taken by Ben's mom I will update them.
The day started with reservations as we fell asleep at 5 and when the alarm went off at 5:30 I decided that getting at least 20 minutes of sleep was better than shaving, so I set the alarm for 6. At 6 we jumped out and raced like a bat out of hell to grab everything and get it in the car. We zoomed away to Rebecca's house and then to Ben's, getting there approximately 10 minutes late.
On the way down we did some wonderful craft items, I made a ring and Zebs made bracelets for the three ladies. Ben laced one of my boots with Macrame cord. The ladies had a politcal debate in the back.
After a lengthy traveling period we arrived and suited up.
/loses interest
I'll just go with some highlights.
Molotov was amazing. Zebs won the Noblemen costume contest. We each gave a rose to a pretty lady, and they were all amused. There was a sad looking girl sitting on the grass and I talked to her, but I failed to invite her to join her us. I felt badly afterwards. The Dreadnought was cool, but not five dollars cool. Christophe the Insulter's Five O'Clock show went for almost 2 hours. It was hilarious. Ben and I got bags full of leather for very cheap. I gave the ring I made to an emo girl, she looked at me as though I was a complete freak. I also got a horn, and Ben stole my spoon, but the nice bag lady made him give it back, and then she showed off her spoon collection, and it was very nice. |
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| (no subject) |
[Aug. 3rd, 2006|03:40 am] |
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I almost went to Appleton this weekend with the sole intention of becoming a slut. However, due to forces beyond my control my plans were broken, |
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| (no subject) |
[Jul. 27th, 2006|10:05 am] |
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mmm, nothing like being horribly terrified to start your day off right. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jul. 27th, 2006|08:41 am] |
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It feels so incredibly akward to be the only one in a room without an alcoholic beverage in your hand. |
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| Cuz I'm a lame-o |
[Jul. 26th, 2006|04:19 pm] |
WOULD YOU...
[_] give me your number? (_ _ _) _ _ _- _ _ _ _
[_] kiss me?
[_] let me kiss you?
[_] want to get in my pants?
[_] watch a movie with me?
[_] take me out to dinner?
[_] let me drive you somewhere
[_] take a shower with me?
[_] have sex with me?
[_] take me home for the night?
[_] let me sleep in your bed?
[_] Sing car karaoke w/ me?
[_] re-post this for me to answer your questions?
[_] receive a piggyback ride?
[_] Come pick me up at 3 am because my car ran out of gas in the middle of nowhere
[_] Lock me in your room and take advantage of me?
[_] lick my cheek?
[_] dance with me?
[_] let me make you breakfast?
[_] tickle me to death?
[_] let me tickle you?
[_] stick up for me if i was being put down?
[_] play strip poker with me?
[_] instant message me?
[_] greet me in public?
[_] hang out with me?
[_] bring me around your friends?
D0 Y0U...
[_] think im cute?
[_] think im hot?
[_] want to kiss me?
[_] want to suck me?
[_] want to cuddle wit me?
[_] want to hook up with me?
[_] want to have sex with me?
AM i...
[_] smart?
[_] cute?
[_] funny?
[_] cool?
[_] loveable?
[_] adorable?
[_] compassionate?
[_] great to be with?
[_] attractive?
[_] mean?
[_] odd?
HAVE Y0U EVER...
[_] thought about me?
[_] thought about hookin up with me?
[_] found yourself wanting a kiss from me?
[_] wished i were there?
[_] grabbed me?
[_] had a crush on me?
[_] idolized me?
[_] wanted my number?
[_] had a dream about me?
[_] been distracted by me?
[_] wanted to have sex with me?
ARE Y0U...
[_] happy you know me?
[_] mad at me?
[_] thinkin bout me?
[_] going to repost this so that others and I can answer this for you? |
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| (no subject) |
[Jul. 24th, 2006|10:45 pm] |
I am cursed with a body only attractive to 15 year olds.
I might just run away and hide in a cave where I don't have to think. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jul. 23rd, 2006|02:50 am] |
| [ | My Mood |
| |  confused? | ] |
| [ | The Minstrels Play |
| | Lordi - Hard Rock hallelujah | ] |
Why don't boys ever go down on girls? |
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| (no subject) |
[Jul. 22nd, 2006|12:30 am] |
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Thursday before DnD Jake and I were hanging out in the back of computer renaisance with Will, with Coin-operated Boy playing in the background( I got both of them hooked on Dresden Dolls, that song in particular). when I realized it had the perfect skanking beat, except it was too slow. so I started skanking at half speed, which was highly amusing and then jake doubled the speed of the song and it was the perfect beat, but since I didn't want to break the computer parts I didn't demonstrate my awesome lack of skanking skills. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jul. 15th, 2006|04:49 pm] |
Whoa! I'm updating for Voloss
~Droogie |
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| (no subject) |
[Jul. 15th, 2006|01:46 am] |
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I have just had my driver's license returned to me, apparently she did throw it out the car window... |
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| (no subject) |
[Jul. 10th, 2006|06:36 am] |
I hate the way that everything in my life has to life by rules and honour.
I want it to stop, altruism is nice, but it's an insidious disease when it is unreturned.
I would love to do anything mindless of the consequences, but unfortunately I can't just do whatever I think will make me happy, I have to think about others. |
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| Don't take rides from strangers |
[Jul. 9th, 2006|05:02 am] |
| [ | Tags | | | kill me | ] |
| [ | The Minstrels Play |
| | All American Rejects | ] |
I'm sick of being a knight. It has only caused pain. after I talk to my father about being robbed, I will formally renouce my self appointed knighthood.
And I can't even say it was the worst night I've had because there is one that was much worse. I'm an idiot and deserve to die. I can't do anything properly and I'm so fucked up emotionally. it would be for the best if I was put down.
afterthought: I am not hott, no matter who tells me otherwise.
Edit: knighthood has been officially renounced. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jul. 8th, 2006|03:26 pm] |
Well, I love getting abandoned.
I can't say I wasn't at least partially expecting it though.
oh well, Zebs and I will still get there to see Dresden and Panic! |
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| (no subject) |
[Jul. 6th, 2006|05:28 am] |
On July 4th, 2006, at approximately 5pm, I recieved a call from Mary Jo, She, Tara, Zebs, and Sam were at Fetaz in downtown Green Bay and it seems they wanted me to be there as well, I do not know why. I left and got there around 6, in the process managing to park in a very illegal spot, because the police gave me permission, cuz I am special like that...
Anyway, I met up with them, and we eventually met up with others and marked out a spot on the shore for watching the fireworks. Tara's friend was going to meet us, but never did, and when Mary jo and I walked along the bridge looking for her father, we saw Tara's friend, and Tara's friend didn't want to move, and this upset Mary Jo, because she was stuck int he middle of Tar and Tar's friend.
We got back to the spot on the shore just as the fireworks were starting, I became a pillow for Sam and Gloria, and we watched the fireworks, they were ok. So we dinked around for a while after the fireworks and walked around the river area. after a short time Gloria had to go home, so we trundled back to our cars and I was happy that mine hadn't been towed or ticketed. I brought Floria home and then met the rest of the gang at Perkins, the military one mind you, becuase that's where all the cute waitresses work. We didn't get a cute waitress though, we got a mean old one who swore, yelled at us, and took forever to bring us refills or do anything with us, which was espeically annoying as we were in two booths because of how busy they were.
So, we deicded that it would be awesome to shoot off the fireworks that zebs had. so we all trundled off to his house, and then we realized that Tim had to be home shortly, so we just hung around in the street at his house. Mary Jo was out of it, especially after Tim explained that his girlfriend disliked Mary Jo for absolutely no reason. Zebs and I attempted to cheer her up, but we didn't do so well, so I ended up just sitting next to her on the curb. She asked if I would take her home, and I agreed.
The ride to her house was silent except for a few directions, and when we got to her house, I asked her if she was going to be ok, and the look of pain on her face made me fall in love with her. except it wasn't with her, but with the pain she was in, and I have never hated myself more than I had at the moment of that realization. That I was right a few months ago when I thought that I had never known love and instead confused it with paina nd those that needed guidance and help. Another thing that was pretty bad was that I was absolutely no help to her when she needed it.
I am a failure. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jul. 5th, 2006|09:59 am] |
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I realized a pretty painful truth at around 2am this morning, I shall write more on it after class. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jul. 3rd, 2006|12:29 am] |
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I have an interesting compulsion to carve "I told you I was hardcore" into the back of my hand. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 26th, 2006|10:52 pm] |
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I've realized that the reason why I like programming so much is becuase I get to help almost every one in class. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 25th, 2006|08:43 pm] |
I have dishonoured myself and am undeserving of the title Knight Errant.
I cry the pardon of everyone involved. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 23rd, 2006|02:20 pm] |
Zebs's door is locked, so I am updating from right outside of his door.
Poor Will, Scott is going to dirt him when the lease comes for renewal, and then Will is going to have to pay the rent all by himself.
I guess I am going to summerfest afterall.
Someone just came and dropped off a package for John, Zebs's dad.
whoa, I just gained entrance to the house! |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 23rd, 2006|01:03 pm] |
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There was a taco bell run during D&D last night. A group of kids from bayport high school was there, and engaged us in conversation. We talked to them for a while, and then we met scott and clarise in the parking lot, and then the bayport kids came out, and peeled away, throwing their food at us and yelling obcensities. I pitched by cup of water at them, but it struck the corner of the Taco Bell sign, so I failed my attack roll against their car... |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 21st, 2006|11:09 pm] |
| [ | My Location |
| | Vicious | ] |
| [ | My Mood |
| | blank | ] |
| [ | The Minstrels Play |
| | Coin Operated Boy - Dresden Dolls | ] |
I am totally, seriously a coin operated boy. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 11th, 2006|01:29 am] |
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I am very confused about my life and what I want. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 9th, 2006|02:25 am] |
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I wonder where I caught this cold from... |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 6th, 2006|05:01 am] |
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I am not a bad person. I am semi-confident that I am not a bad person. I have no idea if I am a bad person...am I? |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 4th, 2006|12:43 am] |
Chadwich's To Do list.
1: Install XP Pro on Veronica.
2: Install XP Pro on Vicious
3: Talk to Rachel about visiting her in Milwaukee
4: Stop hating myself.
5: Clean the living room
6: Fiinish my library books |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 3rd, 2006|08:35 pm] |
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I just looked down and noticed that I was missing a chunk of my hand/. |
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| Update |
[Jun. 3rd, 2006|12:45 am] |
<table bgcolor='#99ffff' border=3 bordercolor='#0033ff' cellspacing=0 cellpadding=3><tr><td align=center bgcolor=white><font size=+2 style='color: black;'>C</font></td><td valign=middle align=left><font style='color: black;'><b>Cute</b></font></td></tr><tr><td align=center bgcolor=white><font size=+2 style='color: black;'>H</font></td><td valign=middle align=left><font style='color: black;'><b>Hardworking</b></font></td></tr><tr><td align=center bgcolor=white><font size=+2 style='color: black;'>A</font></td><td valign=middle align=left><font style='color: black;'><b>Appealing</b></font></td></tr><tr><td align=center bgcolor=white><font size=+2 style='color: black;'>D</font></td><td valign=middle align=left><font style='color: black;'><b>Dignified</b></font></td></tr><tr><td align=center bgcolor=white><font size=+2 style='color: black;'>W</font></td><td valign=middle align=left><font style='color: black;'><b>Warm</b></font></td></tr><tr><td align=center bgcolor=white><font size=+2 style='color: black;'>I</font></td><td valign=middle align=left><font style='color: black;'><b>Intense</b></font></td></tr><tr><td align=center bgcolor=white><font size=+2 style='color: black;'>C</font></td><td valign=middle align=left><font style='color: black;'><b>Colorful</b></font></td></tr><tr><td align=center bgcolor=white><font size=+2 style='color: black;'>H</font></td><td valign=middle align=left><font style='color: black;'><b>Honorable</b></font></td></tr><tr><td colspan=2 bgcolor=#0033ff><font size=1 class='size: 5pt;'> </font></td></tr><tr><td align=center bgcolor=white><font size=+2 style='color: black;'>W</font></td><td valign=middle align=left><font style='color: black;'><b>Warm</b></font></td></tr><tr><td align=center bgcolor=white><font size=+2 style='color: black;'>H</font></td><td valign=middle align=left><font style='color: black;'><b>Honest</b></font></td></tr><tr><td align=center bgcolor=white><font size=+2 style='color: black;'>I</font></td><td valign=middle align=left><font style='color: black;'><b>Insane</b></font></td></tr><tr><td align=center bgcolor=white><font size=+2 style='color: black;'>T</font></td><td valign=middle align=left><font style='color: black;'><b>Tempting</b></font></td></tr><tr><td align=center bgcolor=white><font size=+2 style='color: black;'>E</font></td><td valign=middle align=left><font style='color: black;'><b>Enchanting</b></font></td></tr></table><BR><form method="POST" action="http://www.go-quiz.com/acronym/acronym.php">Name / Username:<input name="name"><BR><input type=submit value="Get your name acronym!"><BR>
</form><a href="http://www.go-quiz.com/acronym/acronym.php">Name Acronym Generator</a><BR>From <a href="http://www.go-quiz.com">Go-Quiz.com</a>
sorry I didn't update with actual stuff. but this is fun?
harum, bad coding, and I am too lazy to fix it. |
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| (no subject) |
[May. 29th, 2006|02:14 am] |
| [ | My Mood |
| | sad | ] |
<table border=1 bordercolor=black cellspacing=0 width=250px><tr><Td align=center bgcolor='yellow'><font style='font-family: wingdings; font-size: 64pt; color: black;'>></font><BR><font style='font-family: Arial; font-size: 32pt; color: black;'>WARNING</font></td></tr><tr><td align=center bgcolor=black><font style='font-family: Arial; font-size: 14pt; color: yellow;'>Chad is radioactive. Wear protective clothing at all times.</font></td></tr></table><BR><form method="POST" action="http://www.go-quiz.com/warning-label/warning-label.php">Username:<input name="uname"><input type=submit value="Get your warning label"><BR>
</form>From <a href="http://www.go-quiz.com">Go-Quiz.com</a>
I just crashed. I know these things should not bother me, but they do. and there is nothing I can do about it except get over it, but I do not how to, and I am not sure I would want to get over it.
I guess I had fun, but it was also pretty lame, like when the cute cashier at family dollar said goodbye to me, and I almost broke down for no reason, or Rachael asking me how far I had gone in the evil park, I'm a true gentleman(heh, feel free to laugh) so I simply told her "enough to make me hate myself everytime I close my eyes." But hey, I got awesome knee socks today, so I can actually wear shorts.
I got emo glasses. cuz they make me look pretty. and if I look pretty then people will like me, right? |
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